Let’s address the fallacy that a capacity for empathy is a necessary quality in a friend. A narcissist may also be a valuable companion.
Being best friends with someone doesn’t mean that you Skype twice a week at a specific time every time. It doesn’t mean that you text each other all the time, or call every Sunday night before you go to sleep. You don’t have to litter their Timelines or their Ask Boxes with inside jokes or half-hearted “I love you”s in an attempt to keep the relationship as strong as it used to be.
Because if you really are best friends, you shouldn’t have to do any of that stuff to still be best friends. And you shouldn’t be upset if your counterpart in this relationship doesn’t do those things - people have lives beyond one friendship, and real best friends realize and respect that. Being best friends shouldn’t be work. It shouldn’t be hard. You shouldn’t feel threatened that the relationship is going to break just because your contact is somewhat lacking.
Being best friends with someone means that even when you’re apart for months, or sometimes even years, and you don’t keep up constant contact, and you both get other friends, and interests, and your personalities change, you still come back together at some point and you act like nothing has changed. Because nothing has. You’re still best friends. And if you feel like you need to prove that to each other, then you obviously never were.
Story: My life.
that moment when you don’t know if it’s right to be honest with your friend for their best interest or keep their side to make sure they don’t go off the deep end….
i want them to see the realistic side of things…but then again i feel like she might overreact like she has with others….and then we might never speak again. :/
also friends but that doesnt have a ALC
I hate it when I get so mad that I say horrible things to people. I really need to learn to not let it build up and explode. This is the second time it’s happened, and it’s just not good. I feel like I’m ruining good things, and it sucks. It really does. I’ve managed to hurt two people already, I feel bad, but now I just feel empty.
I say a lot of shit about people needing to speak up, but truthfully I suck at saying things on the spot. And words can’t be taken back.
I’ll just become a hermit now, thanks. I can’t escape this madness soon enough. The situation does suck, I just react in a suckier way. Life needs to have a pause button so I can write shit down. Guh.
Personal relationships are hard. I love love, but I just can’t do it myself. My personal being is a big “fepic ail”. bah.